Estrangement

 

 

 

 

Estrangement 

 

I saw her passing me today 

a girl I knew, or thought I did.

In five years that we have re-met,

She has walked by without a whit 

 

Of recognition, eyes unseeing 

Cant, or won’t acknowledge us

Two children who played at dolls

Innocence touched now with rust 

 

And tainted with age and pride, 

Which she falls on to explain 

And reason her demeanor with, 

She blames me, holds in disdain

 

For being in her perfect world 

Knowing her weakness, deficits 

All polished beauty and veneer

What used to be pigtails and clips

 

The odd crushes and teen boy bands 

Is she scared I’ll give away 

Her imperfections growing up?

Or maybe that I might betray 

 

The not so lofty origins 

From whence we came here to be 

But while I would smile at her 

It seems she is ashamed of me 

 

Or rather, of what I stand for 

A reminder of some grey past 

Which mars her glittering present

Blots her Now with shadows cast

 

From yesterday, and long before 

When we were but two little girls 

Who knew each other at a school 

Which was our hidden magic world 

 

I am not hurt, but yes, confused

Who are you, and who am I? Who

Are we in dim memory?

Those days lost, the years flown by

 

Puzzles me this gap, fracture

Enigma of a broken friend 

All we’d need is a shared look 

How then did familiarity end? 

 

 

© CM

27.09.2012

 

 

 

  We’ve all known at least one person-neighbor, high school classmate or junior, that freckly guy who worked the shift with you, who you ran into a couple of years or a couple of kids later. Instead of a wave ( really, no one expects them to fall into my arms crying), you get a flash of recognition and a scurry in the opposite direction. Erm, what just happened?

 

 With facebook, twitter, reddit, any and all the social networking sites, most of us have more ‘friends’ we know what to do with. The whole definition of the word stands drastically redefined. So are those thirty seven people who ‘liked’ your new picture your friends, or that one guy you’ll call to drunkenly promise you’re never, ever going to drink again? 

 

 And then you have another category. The hot friends cooling. The scurriers who seem to be embarassed by your entry into their new, polished world. Because, you know, you’ve known them before the glitz and the glamour happened. You’ve seen them as a spotty kid (heck, you were one yourself!) You’ve seen the phase where they thought nothing is cooler than pigtails and barettes, or those years where they worshipped Michael Jackson when everyone knew the Spice girls was where it’s at (or maybe that was just me.. heh).

 

 At the end of the day, it doesn’t even matter. In the long scheme of things, they’re just somebody that you used to know (shoutout to Gotye, good man!) We all have interlinked lives. All the world’s a stage, we play our lives out and move on. The good, the bad and the plain ol’ ugly happens to all of us. When confronted with reminders of a past you don’t want to remember, it’s up to you- Will you tuck your tail between your legs and sidle away? Or give it a nod with your head held high?

 

 You’re you now. Unstoppable, unflappable, unfallible you. And nothing and no one is going to take you down. Not even your old crush. 

 

 

 

Love and light,

~Cookie.