So much is often said about daring to dream. To envision, to paint a picture in your mind’s eye when both your eyes are open. You’d think, after all the quotes, the stories, the poems, you’d think it would be easier to dare to dream.
But to dream is, in actuality, an extremely brave thing. You have to believe in the possibility of betterment. In the premise that a better future exists. To dream, to be able to dream, you have to hope. You have to let yourself hope.
To build a dream, you have to have the courage to paint a world ahead of you.
Something I’ve always been incapable of, until recently.
It’s always been a feat beyond my ken, to even put myself out there, enough to dare to dream. To think that there could be something, or someone, in my life I’d want to live for. That I could find myself worth living for.
And yet, it’s true. I find myself in completely uncharted territory, daring to dream. Daring to imagine a life where I can have the job I want, the friends I want, the life I want. A home, the slightest possibility of marital bliss, maybe even children. It’s as if walls have fallen away and my mind is racing to infinity in all directions, from it’s pedestal of contentment. And truly, I’ve never been content enough to allow myself, to dare to dream.
Of Joy. Of happiness. To think of a place where my existence is not a mindless drudgery. To think of myself in such a place, and more. To love, to be loved. Dreams of happiness, like never before.
And I see them so plainly, that it’s as if through an open window. A mirror of glass so crystal clear that it would ripple, were I to touch it. And I’m afraid, I’m almost afraid to look at them too long. That my dreams might splinter and break under the very weight of hope I’m pinning on them. The unexplainable dreams that stemmed from some radiant moment, the dreams who’s absurdity I cannot begin to reason, dreams, all these dreams. Am I building them up, just to be crushed under their weight, when they fall? Is there an answer to the uncertainty that I’ll survive another broken tie, another wasted effort?
I suppose that it’s a chance I’m willing to take, even if unconsciously.
Now that I’m daring to dream…
Starlight and moonwhispers,
Ps. Sing with me, even if just for today ❤