Of late, both my writing, and my thoughts, have been nothing but bitter and introspective. It makes sense, because I have plenty to be bitter about. But some days, days like today, make me realize all the things I should be grateful for.
Two of my close friends came back a day ago. I was excited enough to see them again, but the day just got gloriously better after a smattering of small events. One of my close friend’s has just become a doctor and started his internship. When I called him in the late morning, he was with a patient, and explaining what pills need to be taken when. He couldn’t talk, obviously, but hearing him like that, it made my heart swell with such a burst of maternal pride that it was a shock, a shot of pure, undiluted happiness to the very ends of my nerves. Granted, I’m only a year older than him, but my little boy! All grown up and a doctor! Is this what parents feel like when they see their children flourish? Surely, it can’t even be fraction of that. And my other friend made me no les proud. He had a rough patch recently, but when I saw him, I was nothing but proud of him for how well he was dealing with it. Not even in his twenties yet, and more of a man than men I know. How could I but not be so inexpressibly proud of them?
I don’t think I’ve ever acquainted you all with my best friends. Both are equally dear to me- in fact, both two halves of me. There is nothing to me without them. My best friend is the sort of person who is so genuine, so unfathomably beautiful on the inside, that it can’t help but show on the outside as well. He has this thing, of walking into a room, and immediately changing the aura of the place. He doesn’t talk much, but he still manages to reassure, revitalize and restore everyone who comes in contact with him- like a walking soul booster, lol. He was this quiet, self assured air of a man who knows he’s right, because he is, about everything. In all the time I’ve known him, I’ve never seen him make even one decision that’s morally objectionable, or ethically questionable. His only flaw is being unflawed, even. And hes loyal. And faithful. And loving and protective and supportive and self sacrificing… He is without question, the strongest willed man, in fact, the strongest man, I have ever known.
Sometimes I think he doesn’t even know it. I doubt he even realizes how unusual it is, in this world of horrible people, to be an actually pure human being. I’m not saying that he’s a saint or something- he actually has a sense of humor that could make Lucifer blush, when he’a in the mood for it. But for the rest part, he’s a completely untarnished and untainted person. I come away feeling like a better person every time we’re together, because he brings out the best in me, just as he brings out the beat in everyone – how awesome is
My other best friend and I, have a peculiar relationship. In that, we haven’t ‘met’ yet. Physically, I mean. She was on Facebook and scrolling through a poetry group’s wall, when he screen froze on one of my poems. It just got stuck there, and she read it, liked it, and added me. I saw that she was from Melbourne (I always miss Melbourne) and our comments back and forth were fun, so I accepted. And our lives changed forever.
She’s another of those people who come along once in a lifetime (hehe I found two of them- how awesome is that?) Again unerringly right. A will of steel and nerves of wrought iron, and a heart of pure gold, all wrapped up in this quiet, tiny teddy bear of a person. I’ve seen her be so nice and caring towards people who went out of their way to hurt her, that I can’t decide whether I should punch them, or yank her ear for it. We have a pet threat, the Broom. Mister Broom makes a frequent appearance in our conversations because she gives me ample reason to pull him out- she simply cannot stop being nice. Even to complete jackasses. People who don’t deserve a stray backwards glance from her, let alone her undivided attention and sympathy as they pour out their troubles to her. I would love for her to learn to be a little selfish. It would be reassuring, at least. And it wouldn’t detract from the rest of her caring and loving persona at all. She’s so magnificent that a little selfishness would still be completely outshone by her sheer awesomeness. And she’s tough too, tough as nails when she has to be. She’s seen the worst kind of people, but that still didn’t stop her from becoming one of the best- how awesome is that?
It just struck me today, that I might have no ambition of living my own life, because of all the impossible dreams I’ve seen for myself- I’ve pretty much given up on the unattainables I’ve set my heart on. But a part of me wants to live for many, many years, to see my friends flourish and grow, to see them happy in whatever they’re doing, to see them and support them in everything they want to do.. Because I truly have the best friends in the world. How awesome is that?