Day Twelve : The Smell of Sunset

The grey canal empties
sluggishly into the backwaters
meandering beyond the third balcony
on the seventh floor. The wind
smells like forgotten fish
and sometimes like jasmine
My neighbour smells like that, too.

Voices carry from the parking lot. Sharp
tones cut through the general clamour of
traffic and jackdaws. My father is flirting
with the cook. She’s repulsed, but she
needs this job. We watch till we can’t.

The ocean is very close, the salt taste
lingers in my room, I can’t resist the urge
to let the ocean into my room
when I’m so close. Every evening I let it
roll onto my tongue.

The water stays murky.

The sky doesn’t care
Colours wash over my face
They smell of sunset



I forget sometimes, that there is no end to hate.

I don’t like that word. Hate. It implies weight. It is a burden. It is a two-edged sword that you cut yourself on, when you hold it. Like a snake that’s poisonous from the non-bitey butt end too.

Hate is important. It gives you reason. At the very blind white hot rage edges of sanity, when anger consumes you and your nerves are spitting fire trying to hold your composure, it’s Hate that sustains you, not love. Love comes later, to be sure. But in that moment, hate is very, very important.

My father was talking to a person who’d visited our house for the very first time today. By means of introducing me, he said, “This is my oldest daughter. I’m going to hire a driver for her soon, to take her to a park so that she can run. Look at how fat she is.” The man stared at the ground, embarassed and mumbling that I wasn’t all thaaat fat. I stared at my beast of a father, beyond a boiling fury and yet, completely still. In that moment, I realised that I was always find reason to hate him more. Hate. With a singularity and purity that I only have for one other thing in my life: Love.

I love me. I love this whole utterly fucked, unspeakably glorious and splendid world I live in. I love the sunsets in the third balcony on the seventh floor, even if they reflect prism-like over a brackish and smelly stream. I love my friends who forget me, I love my friends who don’t, I love my battered family units, I love that wonder who holds my heart, I love books and words and music and -me. I love me. Madly so, because they and we and he and I deserve it.

And I hate him. He deserves it.

Day Twelve of NaPoWriMo. I’ve written a Haibun for the prompt, with prose, followed by a Haiku, that briefest of forms I seem to shake hands with only every NaPoWriMo.

Did I forget to say, I love you all too?

And man, do you deserve it!






She had her hands wrist deep in mud

Her fingers worried some lost root
That had the owner breathless, caught
The flowers grew misshapen, blue
The air in their gasping mouths, taut
Lines of leaves dying in vain,
Holding no sustenance, the tree
Was dying, rotting inside out,
She knelt at its graveside, to free

The tendril of forgotten life
That somewhere in its belly coiled
I found her, hands wrist deep in mud
Pale face streaked damp with hopeful soil
That harbored yet an aching cry
No one had stopped, no one had heard
This lone slip of a girl had stopped
Forlorn on her way, and turned

I touched her shoulder and she stilled
Had she not, frenzied, seen me come?
Her quivering lip gave me answer
Blind eyes, whimpering lips struck dumb
A milky stare that I could look through
A mind of endless blackened depths
But for its confused rolling mass of sensation
Less, not more lightless

I reached a finger to her face
I passed through her, I took her with
The tree would stand, as is, dying,
No more dead tomorrow, and no less
This jewel in the tattered smock
Babbling, incoherent beggar girl
Glowed like an ember in gray dust
She deserved more than this lost world

I took her home, across the veil
As her feet grew into the tree
The next one to stop to help her
Next worthy of my love will be
For now, her fingers dance in clay
That grows itself along her veins
The lidless stare shines benevolent
As queen on her new throne she reigns

What am I but a collector?
A bored god seeking shiny stones
Stray bits of burning humanity
To flesh the rock of my cold home
All the beautiful ones live here
Small goddesses, nurtured and loved
That I could save from that lost mass
of meat and thought I’ve no use of

I am but almost all entombed
Cut off by these walled in souls who
Are all I’ll take to my slumber
These invisible beautiful women, too
Fragile to leave on that cold earth
Amidst the hungry, ravenous beasts
Monsters I am too tired to fight
Creatures I’ve abandoned to their feasts

I am surrounded by fireflies
The last dredges of purity
The chipped pieces of my images
That hold vestiges of mercy
Each one I loved, each one I saved,
Each one who in turn now save me,
Each one who stopped one a rainy night
To help a scared, suffocating tree

Fireflies on the Walls

c. Yusra





Image credit: Imgur :



Cookie Reviews!- Gyaros Book One : The Mice Eat Iron




Cookie Reviews! 



Hello everyone! 


I know I know, I’m horribly late and lazy too. but in defense I had exams kicking me up and down the week. However, better late than never, and here we are! 

I’d promised you all a review of a terrific book, and I’m linking you to it below so you can see for yourself just how awesome it is. The book is called Gyaros Book One: The Mice Eat Iron, written by Rohan Healy and Alex Healy from rohan7things, and I have to say, it’s really rekindled my interest in the science fiction genre again. 

Gyaros is set in the futuristic world of Carthage, the cradle of the new civilization, which is neighbor to the red moon, Gyaros. The contrast between the two settlements is as stark as day and night- while Carthage is a near utopian fully efficient society, Gyaros is the the dumping ground for all those deemed unfit to live on Carthage, an open prison with its own laws and lawmakers. 

Our main protagonist in this new world is Miles Stanton, a quiet and unassuming guy in his twenties, living the normal man’s dream life in Carthage. He works in the Energy Department and lives in the suburbs with his wife and son, and is soon to be promoted as well. It’s all going good, and Miles knows it too, till one, just one ill-fated day that throws everything in his life off balance. Out of nowhere Miles finds himself being shipped unceremoniously off to Gyaros, where he has to fight tooth and nail for his survival, and his sanity. 

The background for the entire novel is so brilliantly thought out, that you make the transition through the pages with Miles, without even noticing it. First the deceptively beautiful Carthage, and then the harsh reality of the red moon, both so expressively painted that you can see where Miles is, what he’s doing, and sometimes, what he’s missing too. Miles himself is the ultimate survivor, and it’s so fascinating to watch him discover his surroundings and discover himself through the extremes he faces. And not just Miles, but the people he meets too, the powerful, grizzly bear sized Maxen, and the innocent yet enigmatic child, Lucy. As much as I’m tempted to tell you what happens, I won’t, ’cause that’ll just give all the fun away won’t it? What I can tell you is that it’s a truly inspiring story of friendship and struggle and victory, and you’ll find yourself at the edge of your seat all the way through the fast paced but detailed narrative. 


I’d advise you all to hop over to Gyaros and look for yourself. I can guarantee that you won’t be disappointed! In fact, soon there’ll be the second book to read too! How pawsome is that? 





Have you read Gyaros yet? Do share what you thought of it in the comments below! 🙂




Cookie ❤

Your Friendly Neighborhood Cookie Monstah! =)





Hello everyone! Here we are! 🙂


I have some promises to keep, and miles to before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep. But emphasis on promises. I was guest interviewed  for winning the writing contest at Uvi Poznansky’s blog, and it comes with a sneaky lil picture of me, as well. For all of you curious as to what I look like, peekaboo away here –


I’ve copy pasted the interview below, since I have two Liebster Award nominations to answer as well. I’ve consolidated them all somewhat, since I haven’t answered the questions I already did in the interview. Sorry for the confuzzlations, my bad. 😛



Here is Le Interview. 🙂




Interview with
Cookie Monstah
First Place Winner of the Writing Contest on this blog



What makes you write? Where you get your inspiration from?

I think I write because I must. Writing is an outlet for what I’m thinking, what I’m feeling and what I’m imagining, and I’m blessed with a hyperactive imagination. As far as inspiration is concerned.. I think I could write about pretty much anything, but I usually do about things that have affected me, positively or negatively, during the day or over the course of time. There is always an ocean for perception, so you can never really run short of ideas.
The only thing that really holds me back is forms where strict syllable counts are required, especially asymmetric ones. They just throw me off balance, since I tend to navigate by rhythm and feel more than counted out lines. Those kind of poems are doable but tend to take much longer.
How would you define poetry? what does it mean to you?
Poetry is the undefined that we try to put into words. That’s really what I try to do, and what I think all other poets try to do too. We attempt to assimilate the world we perceive around us, through what we sense and what we feel, and translate the physical and emotional stimuli into words and lines.
Nature, relationships, interactions, pain, our imagination, whatever we’re thinking of, but portrayed as verses instead of images and memories. Rhymed or not, formatted or not, poetry remains poetry. In fact my inability to write unrhymed poetry without falling into prose, makes me respect the people who can, even more.
Do you write from personal experiences? Is there a process you take to get into the mental place you need to write? Do you go back and edit your work often?
I do write from my own life, but I borrow heavily from what I see and know about others too. I’ve seen some terrible things happen, some to me, some to friends, and some to strangers. They often defy logic, sometimes they defy even a semblance of humanity. Such extremes and platitudes of human behavior do make a study in themselves. Mostly though, I write about things happening in my life. And my friends. I love writing for my friends, since obviously, I love my friends. I also write for my fiancé, but ah, those poems won’t ever see light of day.
I don’t really ‘try’ to get into a place to write, it just happens. When I must write, I must, and I do it immediately if possible. While I’m writing, the world takes on a slightly surreal quality, and I retreat into a small bubble of sorts till I’m done. My family and friends know this derp-face tendency very well, and will generally leave me alone for the five ten minutes that I’m scribbling away furiously.
I rarely edit my work. Unless there’s a glaringly obvious mistake, I’ll leave my poems alone once I’m done getting them on paper. Editing doesn’t feel necessary too often.
How long have you been writing? And why do you prefer to stay anonymous? 
I’ve been writing stories since I was seven, and poetry from soon after that. Mum tells me that I liked to make up stories well before that, but well, I don’t really remember any of those. I have more than a few short stories from when I was younger, but only a couple in recent times. Nowadays I write poetry, and I’m working to improve my skills to progress beyond amateur some day.
As for staying anon… I’ve been posting online for two years now. The reason I stay anonymous is that I’m a medical student, and Poetry is not exactly something patients and professors like to associate with a doctor. The overall stereotype of a person with their head in the clouds remains firmly embedded with a lot of people. That and a few personal reasons, are why I’ve stayed anonymous.
It’s only temporary though. When I get a book deal, or when I finish medschool, I’ll integrate my real and virtual worlds again, whichever happens sooner. I’d love to be published some day, as most poets do. Nothing too grandiose. A quiet collection of poems would suit me just fine, lol.
Is there a best time of day for you to write?
Not exactly, but yes. I think my most ‘fertile’ patch clocks in around three a.m. Sometimes I get up at night and write down one or two lines, and go back to sleep. When I wake up, I find I can finish the poem easily enough. These are the vaguer and wilder poems. The rest I write when, well, when I need to write them.
Tell us a bit more about yourself. What do you like doing in your spare time? What things make you happy, or sad?
Haha, spare time is a precious commodity indeed. A fair chunk of my day is spent studying. Most of free time playing with my pets, listening to music, and reading whatever I can get my hands on. I have no qualms whatsoever about skipping sleep time to read. I recently finished the Mortal Instruments trilogy, and it was fabulous. I’ve started reading Tess Gerritsen’s works again since then.
What makes me happy or sad.. Really anything that affects me will leave a fair effect. How we live today leaves very little space for an isolated life, and my moods are almost completely determined by the day’s interactions. And nature. Nature influences me and my work strongly. Give me a good spell of rain and I’ll smile through the day, no matter what!
Who are your favorite poets? Any role models?
My favorite poets of all would be Robert Frost and Lewis Carroll. There’s a lot of others that influence me, but these are always the first two spring to mind. I’ve had The Road Not Taken pinned in front of my desks since I first read it, in third grade.
My role model would be my mother. She is an exceptionally strong woman, and I’ve seen her work through aspects of life that most people are lucky enough to never see. Despite and inspite of all that, she is as iron willed and as sensitive as ever. She’s also a doctor and a published poet, and her poems still remain a source of wonder to me. Every time I go back and read them, I see something that I did not see before, and that wonder is woven in her written stories as well. She’s also incredibly hard working an independent, and has always been and always will be someone I aspire to be more like.
Cookie Monstah posts regularly on her Facebook wall and the groups she belongs to. To read her work, you can find her blog at
You can also follow her on Twitter @cookiemonstahed




I’d one again like to thank Gene and Donna for nominating me. I’m ecstatic that you thought my work was good enough, and I’m so happy you tagged me. 🙂


I’ll quote from Donna’s blog, as it was on the blog where she quoted from.


The Liebster Award is very unique in the fact it brings recognition to the smaller blogs of the ‘verse.  With that in mind, all of the nominated blogs will have under 200 followers.

The rules:

1. Thank the Liebster Blog presenter who nominated you and link back to their blog.

2. Post 11 facts about yourself, answer the 11 questions you were asked and create 11 questions for your nominees. 

3. Nominate 11 blogs who you feel deserve to be noticed and leave a comment on their blog letting them know they have been chosen. 

4. Display the Liebster Award logo. 

5.  No tag back thingys.



Here are the eleven questions that Gene has asked me, that I haven’t answered in the interview.


3. What was the last book you read?

The last book I read was The Apprentice, by Tess Gerritsen.


4. Why did you choose it?

She’s a fabulous writer, and the books are absolutely amazing. I’ve read almost every book she’s written so far. Just two or three more to go!

5. If you could meet any non-Biblical character, who would it be?

I guess right now, my answer is Dr. Hannibal Lecter. 😛

6. Why? (see #5)

I watched Red Dragon just last week, after the tv series Hannibal came out. All the four movies were a fascinating study. Leads me to think Dr. Lecter would be quite a conversationalist. As long as he doesn’t have me for lunch. 😛

7. What is the most exotic place you’ve visited?

Ermagard… Singapore I would say. The place is a whirlwind of color!!


8. What is an item on your bucket list?

Hmm. I would definitely want to go back to Melbourne, to that place I keep talking about. Ocean Road, I will see you again some day!


9. When is the last time you slept outdoors?

Heeheehee, just last week. I napped in the rain. 😀

10. If you could be any movie character, who would it be?

I would be Natalie Portman in the Black Swan. The ballet! and the juxtaposition of light and dark character! 🙂

11.Are you the oldest child, youngest child, in the middle, or only child?

I’m the oldest! Boooo! 😦


And here are the new questions from Donna’s blog! 🙂


  1. What is your favorite poem?

    It’s always been The Road Not Taken. 🙂

2. Do you prefer rhyming poetry or free verse?

            Rhyming poetry. I like free verse as well, but rhymes a wee bit more. 😛
3.  What’s your favorite genre?
            Horror, both movies and books. Particularly psychological and demonic horror. Nothing like a good ol’  possession for a sound sleep. 😛

4. If you could do anything in the world, what would it be?

           I would do something about Africa. I know that sounds vaguely idealistic and pompous, but if I could do something major, I would.
       5. Are you tired of answering these questions yet?
          Heehee, kinda. I hate talking about myself. 😛
6. What do you wish people would write “less” about?
         Conflict. Bigotry, racism, persecution, some nasty trolling. Cyber bullies are a breed that needs to nipped in the right buds. Otherwise they’ll keep multiplying. :-/



With that done, here are 11 people you should definitely check out. And the nominees for the Liebster from me arrrrrre!


1.Rawra! at – Frightfully wondrous things really do happen here! 😀

2.Frohan at Just a tip, make sure you read Misery Lane. The best post I’ve read online, on wordpress and off. It’s heart breakingly eloquent and just so darkly beautiful.

3.– toasty warming! 🙂

4. for poems that will make you think.

5. for poetry that will make you feel! 🙂

6. to see the world as you’ve never seen before! 🙂

7. cause they’re make me think when I want to dumb it out.

8. they’re just so cool!

9. for tankas I couldn’t dream of writing!

10. for the Best. Rants. Ever.

11. for making everyone smile. You just can’t not. 🙂



That’s all for today folks! I’ll be posting the questions for the people I’ve tagged in the next post! So See you tomorrow, and don’t be too naughty! 😛




Your kooky Cookie ❤