Women Like Me 

Women like me,

Make men realize 

That their dreams don’t belong 

Only in their eyes 

That their shoulders are broad enough

For the weight of the world 

And the reduction of all their principle 

Lies in just their word 

That the sky is theirs 

And all this earth 

We make men keenly aware 

Of every inch of their self worth 

We are not statues, but pillars 

We are not decoration

We are not conquest, but glory 

We require dedication 

And we pay you back in blood 

In all of our love 

Women like me are made from your rib

But we hold your spine up. 
And if you can’t appreciate a woman

Who could wither your universe to bits 

If you insist on looking at greatness 

And lingering on the span of its tits 

Then I have already moved past you 

It’s not worth my time, you won’t see 

That I want you on your knees, and 

I’ll nurture you on mine, simultaneously

if you really deserved

A woman like me 


Silent acquiescence? I think not, darling…. ❤️




A whore is pointed at 

Not because she sells herself, but

Because she sells herself for 

Far less than she is worth 

Not because she lets a strange man

Paw her breasts for money 

Sweat on her face, grunts between her thighs 

She’s not bad because she’s ‘easy’

We all have prices 

We all have sold ourselves in

Different ways

At different rates 

Some more than others 

But we all get paid eventually

A different wage 

And sometimes

You have to whore yourself

For a lesson learned that 

Will not be forgotten

Can not be denied 

You lie naked on the floor

Next to a man you thought 

you knew like your own skin

And you realize 

That if the price you paid

Was respect lost, then

That price was altogether too high 


Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. 



Thought starvation, for a period of time
Doesn’t do me any good
The pathology’s the same, like the stomach
The brain too needs its food
Denied a victim, the gastric acid
Into its own walls leaks
-similarly, a concentrated vitriol
An empty mind keeps

Atrophied ideas, dessicated hope
But what’s a hungry girl to do?
When muddied flirtations blend into one another
Faded bruises written black and blue
When nausea becomes a sentient sensation
When you’ve cauterized your heart with self wrought ablation
What’s a girl to do?

I thought too much, now I want to be thin
Your beauty’s enough for both of us, who
Cares about my within
I’ll be like you, just words and skin
Hollow cheeked and empty eyed,
But it’ll do
Hungry, but

© CM

I learnt that being hungry for love is nothing compared to being hungry for respect.  There are some things that just strip you of your dignity.

I don’t remember the last time I felt this small. I think I need to take a break from everything. I might be offline for a few days.
My love to all of you,


And So, It Is Named

And So, It Is Named

I have tired my words tonight, but I’m still going to try to say this.

Sometimes, I find myself overcome by a peculiar sort of fullness. It’s a sensation of weight, but not of burden. More so of.. Completion. And when I sit and close my eyes, it is the weight of the images behind my eyelids. It’s the physical presence of thought upon my forehead. Not weighing down, though.

Giving substance to thought.

The last time I wrote, I was trying to understand the complexities of intensity. Intensity of social interaction, of emotional attachment. Emotional attachment- what a clinical and deficient term for something so purely visceral. Visceral, like my gut would turn inside out. Like I had branded your name into my very marrow, but I could call it emotion, for want of a better explanation.

Where do these emotions lie? Are they the sands where our dreams spiral from? Are they the weight that keeps us grounded? If I give what you and I share, the name of emotion, the name of love, will it cover it? That visceral knot, like nails that have dug past flesh and sinew, and grown roots into my bones- can I call that hopeless tangle, that feverish fury, Love?

I don’t know.

For someone who deals in words, it’s a sad realization that I’ve tired them out. I’ve tired them all out. The phrases are worn and the rhymes are weary. And they all are completely incapable of expressing me anymore. That my body weighs down, with love. That I have come past the stage of missing you when you are not there, to knowing you are, you’re always there. And the fullness persists, like a hunger that has been permanently silenced. Like a starving man, who dreamt of a dry crust of bread, and found that he will now forever be eating a morsel with every flavor known to human beings, with the savory rasp of sinking his teeth into meat, and the decadence of biting into a crisp green apple, with the juices running down his chin.

I am that starved man.

And I found you.

But my words are tired. And I struggle to put that constellation of incoherent emotion into letters. And like the malnourished dreamer who can only call it ‘food’, my articulation is crippled, restricted by how handicapped words are.

And I am reduced to calling it Love.



I loved you
Like I should have loved myself
In sickness and in health
In loss, and in pain
I loved you, when
I should have been loving myself
Again, and again
And again
-That was my strength
That was my spine
I loved you, and you loved you
And that was fine, really
Except that neglect set in
When I forgot me
And I’m empty now, like a lost thought
A vacant lot
And I don’t like it
I’m changing the rules a bit

I’ll love you infinitely
Obscenely, irrationally
When you deserve it, though
Earn it
Learn it
Give me reason to make it true
Because I do love you
But I need to spend some time
Loving me, too


Waters -XLII-



Do not trouble me with
your eddies
With your ever ready
Attempts at
Turning my tide
Brewing storms, or
Your petty outbursts
Of rage
You cannot turn me

I am the ocean
You are a wave

‘Messages Off a Cigarette’

First Month Anniversary Post- The Answer to the Juggalo


The Answer to the Juggalo.
We are all the same, bear with me, that is true,
And that silken thread connects me and you..
I know that the night stretches on endlessly,
And the black is impervious, seemingly..
But there is light here, look within, look inside,
Even though it seems too much to abide,
You cry and cry, no one hears the wails
Every small success marred by perpetual fail,
It hurts to open your eyes,but hush dear,
Open your heart, listen up,look here..
While the blur distracts you, seems to be unquelled,
Im speaking of that which only Time will tell.
Stay strong, stand bold, Juggalo, be brave
The world we are in is a world depraved.
For the faith, for the love, looking around is no use
Is a sham, a mockery, a play played well, a ruse.
Live for yourself, and no one else, my friend
Is the only way out to any good end.
The dance whirls on, choose your song, your turn
Let yourself soar high even if you crash and burn.
Why are we here? i cannot answer, don’t know.
But solving that puzzle will raise you up, make you grow.
Living and dying, the world revolves uncaring
Let your world be you, rest unfeeling.
Sounds selfish, i know.. but not really, its not.
It’s just making sense of what all you’ve got.
Do what you want, not what’s expected by all,
Spread your wings and fly, soar with joy in free fall.
For the people who love you, hold them close, hold them near.
Yet losing yourself, not them should be your first fear.
For them who see not, don’t cringe from their rejection.
Its just that they’re unworthy of your affection
If its a shoulder you want ever, well,, here’s my hand,
Need someone to turn to? here we all stand.
The music plays on, let it warble, not lament
Heal yourself, let life stitch up those rents,
Smile through those tears, for no one else but you.
Find that elusive rhythm, hang on and hold true.
There are years and years stretching ahead of you,
Keep the faith my friend, walk out of this blue.
 I had not intended to post today, but one thing leads to another, and here we are. 🙂
This poem is from a few years back. I dug it out today, because I wanted to post it for a friend. This particular friend, who goes by frohan55 here, is exceedingly contemplative, and inspite his healthy questioning and learning way, I think sometimes when he looks into the darkness for answers, he forgets how he sparkles to those around him. We’re all like that, on occasion. It’s not wrong to want to plan, to map out a path. In fact, it’s the most sensible approach .But sometimes, we need to find a way to reconcile what we need to do, and what we want to do. We get so wrapped up in looking far ahead into the future, that we neglect to see what’s right in front of us… by extension, we forget to see within us.
  There is a multitude of voices in the world, and in that noise, in that jumble of thought, it’s so easy to lose that elusive rhythm of you.. So easy to lose the tune your heart strums. So easy to lose yourself. And it’s not easy to have hope. It’s not simple to keep a straight head some days, and let the your mind keep a rein on your heart. But it’s not impossible, either. It boils down to hanging onto yourself and never letting go. There is no one who deserves your love as much as you do. There is no one who deserves your respect before you. Your flaws and your fabulousness define you, they make you unique. You are unique. And you should remember that. You know who you are, my friend.
 No one’s life is scripted in black and white. Not even a zebra’s. It’s all a palette, with shades so variegated that no artist will ever successfully capture them on canvas. Our positive and negative experiences, our interactions, in the end, they are building blocks. It’s up to us, do we make them obstacles? Or do we let them be stepping stones, that will inevitably raise us to new heights?
   In fact, this applies to all of you, who are having a moment of self doubt. Life is fairly manic. It’s a wonder that some days we get one foot in front of the other. But we do. In the end, we survive, grow stronger, and walk on. I know that you will do just that. You will find yourself, you will walk out of this blue, and you will succeed.
  And I’ll be standing on the finish line with pompoms, doing the I-Told-You-So dance. 😀 😀
Love and light
PS. Had to add a postscript here. I’d like to send a ton of thanks to Paul  ( http://pjb1943.wordpress.com/ ) . Paul was kind enough to nominate me for the “Most Influential Blog Award of 2013″. I’m not sure what I’ve done to deserve such an honor, especially coming from you. Regardless, this shall add a skip in my step for a long time. Thank you so, so much. 🙂 
                         That’s the award. (*does the conga around the room for a bit*)
 Also, it’s the our first month anniversay today! Woot!! And on this joyous and momentous occasion, I want to thank every person following me. I would thank you all by name and send you a muffin if I could, but no one seems interested in building a 4D portal. Anyhoo, thank you so, SO much. I am so grateful for the support, and for the fact you take time from your crazy hectic schedules and read what this ol loon has to say. Thank you so much!! Group hug time!!!!
😀 😀 😀